Update on the Light Phobic Neighbor

On Sunday evening the landlord (who lives far far away from here) calls. She said she had gotten a letter from our neighbor across the road, code name Fargo, complaining to HER about our insensitive insistence on keeping a lightbulb lit on our front porch after dark. The landlord said she called her uncle (who lives here) to ask and when she gave him the name of our friend Fargo, he laughed. Because he had just seen a letter from him to the local newspaper complaining about porch lights, commercial lights, car headlights, etc. Though he didn't name any names.

About an hour later somebody knocks on the door. It's 10:45 PM on a cold and very snowy night (we'd gotten about 15 inches). I knew who it would be. I was right, it was our old friend Fargo.

I opened the door and said "I'm sorry but I'm leaving the light on, you might as well go home". He said "You're leaving it on because you're a stubborn asshole." I repeated my line, he repeated his, I closed the door, he left.

As encouraged before, we called the cops. A couple of patrolmen came by a few minutes later, I told them the above. They looked at our blinding 60-watt lightbulb, and shook their heads. They trudged across the snowy street to talk to Fargo. But curiously, Fargo's house was pitch black. It's NEVER completely dark at his house. You can see lights in his house (and now his Christmas tree) until late at night because he NEVER closes any blinds or curtains... which might help him to blot out the terrible bright lights that inflict his sensitive little eyes.

The cops stood outside of his mysteriously dark house for about 10 minutes, knocking. I don't believe Fargo ever answered the door.

So the count: two personal visits; two stolen light bulbs; one letter to our landlord; one letter to the local paper. That doesn't include him smashing his immediate neighbors' lightbulb in their driveway, coming to our neighbors on our left in his underwear late at night to scream about his lights, following the same neighbor (a tall, big burly guy) home from the local convenience store late at night screaming at him about his lights, etc.

Truly a charmer.